Do you feel like you’ve always been the outlier in your family? Probably not in a way that makes you want to celebrate either. While the other family members seem to mesh so well, you see things a little differently.
Let’s face it. You don’t have much in common with your family members. You have always been the individual, the renegade, the odd one out that just doesn’t seem to fit the bill. This has led to conflict, feelings of rejection, and a general sense of alienation. At times, it seems easier to bite your tongue, but pretending you’re someone you’re not just doesn’t sit right with you.
If you’re feeling this way, you’re likely the black sheep of your family. Being the black sheep can be a difficult position to be in, but there’s a spiritual significance we’re going to address in this article.
Being the black sheep is a catalyst for growth because you’re clearing out a unique path in life rather than following in others’ footsteps. Your soul, for one reason or another, decided to take the fast route to spiritual growth. This is why it chose a position where it simply can’t conform.
And this is a privilege.
You’re the one who’s going to break the chain of hidden family dysfunction that has never been addressed yet affects each passing generation. You are the one chosen to heal the ancestral trauma that has plagued your bloodline. You are the one to bridge cultures and connect with those who seem so different from you.
You are the one.
All you need is some guidance to turn this curse into a blessing, and that’s what we’re going to look at here. It’s time to embrace being the black sheep of the family and use this unique position to your advantage.
What Is the Black Sheep of the Family?
You can view the black sheep of the family as the odd one out. The back sheep is often seen as the rebel who diverges from the customs, traditions, and values of their family and rather embraces their life path.
You might think being the black sheep is a curse, but this isn’t how I see it at all.
Although it can be tough to be an outsider, being a black sheep means you have a nonconformist nature and refuse to mindlessly follow norms. Of course, not all family customs and traditions are bad, but being the black sheep means you question things rather than going along with the flow because it’s normal.
You see through the webs of conditioning, patterns, and programs that many people are ensnared in. If something doesn’t make sense to you, you’re not one to jump on board just because everyone else does.
You are an individualist by nature, and this means that you have the freedom to construct a life that is congruent with your dreams and desires, regardless of external pressure or influences. You diverge from family norms and carve out your path.
While some people will perceive the black sheep to be the family scapegoat or the unempowered victim of the world, that’s not true. Just because you’re a black sheep doesn’t mean you aren’t loved, or accepted. Nor does it mean you’re a punk or deadbeat. You see things differently from the rest of your family which sets you apart from the flock.
If you have these characteristics, you may be a black sheep of your family:
- You feel like you don’t belong
- You are more individualistic than the other members of your family and prefer your own company
- You don’t confine yourself to social norms
- You are curious about things that your family doesn’t acknowledge or seem to care about
- You will follow your calling, regardless of what others think
- You don’t just follow norms, you question them
- You prefer spontaneity over routine
- You find that having a structured life is boring
- You don’t have much in common with your family members
- You question family customs and traditions
- You don’t crumple under social pressure
- You like to stand out of the crowd
- You have a general distrust of authority structures and social hierarchies
- You feel excluded from your family and feel that they don’t value you
- You don’t believe in the conventional route or believe it is not fulfilling
- You have different values from the rest of your family
- You are more rebellious
The Spiritual Significance of Being the Black Sheep of the Family
There is a spiritual significance of being a black sheep of the family. People who are the black sheep of their families often undergo a spiritual awakening, and are chosen to transmute the consciousness of the family tree. They become the spiritual ones of the family because they don’t have that same support structure and influences keeping them in place.
Until now, your family has operated unconsciously. They may be great people (or may not be), but they lack a deeper awareness that provides substance to the family chain. This is where you come in. Your soul chose this position to disrupt patterns and bring awareness into your bloodline. You are the turning point of your entire family line because you set the stage for the forthcoming generations.
This is why you chose a position in the family where you don’t fit in. You’re forced to explore your reality in a new depth to find a deeper meaning within it. This inner exploration leads to awakening, spiritual growth, and eventually healthier and happier family dynamics.
For example, if you come from a very conservative family but have progressive values, you may be the black sheep of the family. Your position varies from the rest of your family, which can cause friction, resentment, and a lack of understanding.
While your family may be very trusting of authority structures, you don’t share this sense of trust. This leads you to question the world, which can lead to unpopular beliefs within your family setting. You may be labeled as a conspiracy theorist or be seen as someone who just doesn’t get it for holding certain beliefs.
Even though the path of the black sheep can be turbulent, it’s ultimately a more fulfilling path to take, especially once you embrace your individuality and begin connecting with like-minded people.
As long as you continue exploring your reality and following your heart, you’ll find that being the black sheep of the family is a blessing. It takes time to mature into the position and find yourself, where you then become a shining example for the rest.
But this process can take time, so it’s important to be patient with yourself. Understand that there may be some hard yards ahead of you before you transcend the patterns and programs of your bloodline and find stability in your role to bring in awareness and positive influence.
Is It Good to Be a Black Sheep?
In most cases, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. As with many family dynamics, most people walk the path that was laid out for them. They model after their parents and adopt similar values, belief systems, mannerisms, and behaviors.
There’s nothing wrong with modeling after your parents, but what if you don’t fit into this box? You have your interests, and perhaps they’re a little unconventional. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with people sharing interests and following customs, but you just don’t see the appeal.
Growing up, I was the odd one out. While my parents and brother all followed successful careers as doctors and lawyers, I had no interest in pursuing what’s commonly deemed a successful life.
Honestly, I just couldn’t (and still don’t) see the value of trading the best part of my life for stability. During my youth, I had a rebellious streak. I wanted to get drunk and smoke weed. I wanted to go to parties and chase women. I didn’t care about studying, being successful, or trying to be someone.
With maturity, I began walking a separate path. I have now spent 8 years living a nomadic lifestyle and found myself drawn into the healing space, especially via shamanic traditions.
While I do have a good family who supports me in these ventures, my divergence in interests and values led me down a very different road in life, which I’m infinitely grateful to be walking.
The path of the black sheep may not be easy. There’s no path at all, but that’s the beauty of it. You have the opportunity to discover that path and be the pioneer of your life rather than following in the footsteps of others.
What to Do if You’re the Black Sheep of the Family
Being the black sheep means that you’re an anomaly. This puts you in a unique position where it can serve your personal growth, as long as you leverage your individuality to create a beautiful life for yourself.
People who are the black sheep can get lost, while others discover a better road that brings them authenticity, deeper fulfillment, and lasting joy. In this sense, it can either be an advantage or a disadvantage, depending on how you work with it.
When you perceive being a black sheep from a victim mindset, you may feel lost, unwanted, and unloved. If you perceive it as an advantage, that is to use this position as a way to further explore your interests and discover a road of deeper meaning in your life, then it can be a blessing.
Of course, you want to use this position as a black sheep as a springboard for deeper self-discovery and learning. That’s why you chose this position on a soul level – to illuminate the family tree and bring new ways of perceiving the world into it.
Being a black sheep is a good thing because your individuality brings more richness to your life experience, and allows you to branch off in ways that most people never consider.
Here are some things you can do to leverage this position as a black sheep to craft an incredible life for yourself:
Follow Your Interests, Not Others
Rather than doing what you should do, think about what ignites a spark in you.
The truth is, most of us are so deeply ensnared by conditioning, programs, and influences that we don’t have much choice in the matter. We end up following the crowd because it’s the path that has been laid out before us.
The conventional road may suit some people, but it’s certainly not for everyone, which is why so many people seem to be unfulfilled.
Being a black sheep means you can see through this wall of programs a little clearer, and make decisions based on your interests rather than others. Instead of doing what you should do, explore your reality. Be different, experiment.
Look for the path of your fulfillment, regardless of what other people tell you. Only you know what will make you happy, and only you can discover the road to get there. Therefore, follow your interests rather than following the path that was laid out for you.
Don’t Settle for Normality
There’s often a stigma of the black sheep being a deadbeat and making poor life choices.
Just because you’re the black sheep doesn’t mean you’re doomed to work in a bar your whole life. Nor does it mean that you can’t create wealth or find success, at least in the conventional sense.
You’re just born for a different role, which is to walk against the beaten track. That’s why you should work towards finding something that you enjoy doing, and it’s not going to be working for other people your whole life.
You are destined to be a leader – a leader in thought, a leader in morality, and a leader in consciousness – which is why you’ve never been a good follower.
Therefore, make sure you build towards a life where you have the opportunity to lead, whether it’s other people or your avocations.
Avoid Feeling Victimized
You may feel like an outsider for the most part but don’t weaponize that feeling. Your path is diverting from the beaten track, but it doesn’t mean you’re any better or worse, fortunate or unfortunate.
Being the emotional punching bag is a common theme for the black sheep. It can be a tricky position because you may feel like you don’t have the same support as those who belong to the tribe.
But you are not a victim, you are a creator.
Even if you’re given the worst treatment, you are never the victim. Victimhood is a mindset, not a condition. And as long as you assume the position of the victim, you’re never going to be constructive.
So, look at the bright side. Look at the advantages of being the black sheep, and how it sets you on a path of inner growth, healing, and prosperity: As long as you own it and make the most of it.
Let Your True Colors Shine
Don’t be afraid to be the odd one out. People who are black sheep may feel pressure to conform to others. You may feel like there is something inherently wrong with you because you don’t tick the same as others you know.
But there is nothing more beautiful than authenticity. You need to learn to be comfortable in your skin, and embrace who you truly are, whether it resonates with others or not.
You are born to be an individual, so allow yourself to be an individual. Conformity isn’t good for anyone at the end of the day. It leads to a very monotonous world.
You can see through the web of conditioning and the smear of lies and deceit. You are a free thinker, as you aren’t bound to social norms. At the end of the day, other people’s approval is not what you need, so be authentic to who you truly are without trying to be someone else.
Guide Yourself With Personal Growth
As long as you’re on a journey of personal growth, you can never go astray.
Personal growth should be your compass when everything else seems confusing. After all, not being so close to family has pushed you into a journey of self-discovery. Whether it’s to find yourself, to cope, or to expand, growth is the way forward.
Use this feeling of not belonging as a springboard for self-discovery. Your inner growth is what’s important. As long as you go down the path of actualization, you’re on a good trajectory.
As you explore yourself and question your reality, you may venture into spiritual territory. Don’t be afraid to go down the rabbit hole of self-discovery because there is nothing more exciting than learning who and what you are.
This means that being a black sheep is a corridor to spiritual awakening because you’re not bound by the conventions of your family or society.
Find Your Tribe
Being the black sheep should spur you to seek out people with whom you can connect. Perhaps you’ve never felt that connection with your family, but you will find home in other people who are troting the road less traveled.
Get out there and see what sort of people you resonate with. Connect with like-minded people, and allow your adventure of consciousness to bring you to new places.
Remember, your drive to be different is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s commendable because it takes courage to walk your path, to be your person, and to explore your reality.
So have fun on this adventure as you find yourself, and don’t be afraid to drift further and further away from the norm. It’s what we need more than ever these days, and there’s a lot of joy and excitement in exploring yourself and other people on a deeper level.